Why?

In case anyone cares, it doesn't matter if you don't.

I thought I would say something about the decades running around the sun.

Hard work isn't it?

I just wanted to say really, that I come from a place of neurodivergence, completely not understood at all when I was young. I'm largely AuDHD

Mental health 'issues' although tbh I feel that anyone with a heart, who cares about the planet, people and animals struggles.

Anxiety, Depression and every other variability.. my label is Cyclothymia (highs and lows really.

Physical disabilities.. interesting how we view that one. I have M.E. (myalgic encephalomyelitis) blessing and curse I think.

Like everyone, there's been heart break, feeling broken, difficulty and more.

Experiences of abuse, trauma, DV and so on.

Wildly surprising to me at times, in amongst the mess and chaos, here's the edited highlight reel. That version of us, we can present that makes it look like we have together and know what we're doing and have no issues.

Not sure how this serves any of us, as it doesn't.

But here's some of those highlights..

First and foremost I am vegan FTA (for the animals). Hugely care about our natural world, children and those suffering. I'm big into consciousness, metaphysics, learning and environmentalism which means I get a label of left wing green person which is fine by me.

I earned 3 black belts, became a champion kickboxer, master teacher and found out that the martial arts actually helped depression, low self esteem / worth and many other areas, obviously like health and wellbeing.

It wasn't really enough for me, I wanted history and philosophy and just more.

So I was fortunate to travel with it and learn from interesting people and some who were not very nice or good people at all.

I decided to create my own place as I couldn't find what I thought it should be like anyplace else. The TAO Academy was about the way, and finding yours.

Holistics, music, wellbeing, martial arts, philosophy and working on the Self.

Before all of that was music, words and art.

I wanted to save the world, well and all the animals in it.

I was hugely inspired by music that made a difference. And loved lots of it that was anti-system, anti - everything wrong in the world.

Hours and hours spent writing, drawing, creating. I didn't think there was any other path for me than music.

Weird how things pan out especially for those introvert kind of extraverted types, you kind of want to get up there and out there and do something.

But afterwards you want to run and hide and well live in the woods with animals and trees.

I found it incredibly hard to balance a creative job, pursuing my own ambitions, life and money and everything else that gets chucked at you.

Yes, I did things I loved, I got to make songs, record them and perform them.

Wrote poetry and prose. Travelled. Read books. Books and more books. Watched films and enjoyed some games.

But it was always like a precarious tight rope walk, when you are walking it, it looks good, when you fall off it, or are hanging from it, not so much.

Along the way I studied art, music, philosophy, photography and then environmental studies.

I've created things visually, written, spoken, sung and musical.

But always there has been the thread of struggle, the hard slap of life, things being difficult and not straight forward.

I now live in Cornwall (although not from here) with my children and animals.

I’ve spent decades working across creative and digital spaces. Much of this project emerged from fracture, exhaustion, observation and the search for something more human beneath modern systems.

At The Edge Of It is not a brand strategy or self-improvement project.

It is simply a place to walk through the trees of life about what it means to remain human within all of this.

Ax

p.s. I did't want to share some of my past works here as I'm not wanting attention to them, the martial arts stuff is fine. My current projects are anonymous so that is easier. There's a nice line between what I want to do as me on a personal level vs what I am doing out there in a creative expression.

And I very much feel life has to be crafted around what works for you, not your neighbour.